i’m still here.
I hate that I’m in a mess again. after I swore I wouldnt do this to myself. now youre no good for me,but I love you,so every cross action you make sends me into despair. shocked and appauled at how you could throw me away and show me such cruelty. its okay,i know you never cared, were never invested,and this was just a joke for you. I was only someone to use. you pretend like youre not the bad guy,bc admitting the truth is too harsh. you dont want anyone to accuse you of being a monster,once word is released, youd have less allies than you do already. so no,i dont want you to touch me or kiss me. I dont want to help or travel with you. I dont want to be your spouse,bc you cant even say that youre my friend and it be the truth. I hope I never have to see you or deal with you again. youre worst than the last manchild I mistook for a loving person.
I am the princess of the blue house.
I sit on those porches, and do as I love.
I send you the best of wishes, M. P.
i am going to have a lost year.
i’m not thinking quite right. right now.
nothing is the way it should be, i don’t fit in with anyone.
i can’t communicate with anyone, we are in babylon.
i promise i will keep writing. i will write until there is nothing left.
i have never been so sincere or serious in my life.
i will write. i will do my work. i will fulfill my purpose, or die trying.
i love everyone, we are not all human, we are not okay.
we are all deeply affected.
there are negative and aggressive things. we have to overcome.
you will know my name, you will see my face.
i will not be ignored.
i’m in it to win it, i want you all to benefit from my missions.
this next year will be the worst and hardest of my life.
things will get more difficult, i’m only kidding myself at this point.
bless us all, we are fucked.
i’ll be making money, writing, being healthy, smoking weed, eating mushrooms, drinking alcohol, and making life happen for myself.
i hope you’re in a certain situation.
see ya later.
all I can do is stay behind and allow you to seperate from me. all I have is more crying and wasted hours in my bedroom. you do not act accordingly. you are rude,inconsiderate,and bouncing off the walls… cant focus unless its something directly for yourself. I know the sooner I leave the better. cutting my losses and not moving forward in time with you is good,bc you are unlucky, cursed even,and in this relationship you push us backwards. you are so full of a fake version of yourself that there is no room for me, and no room for progress. I hate you for lies, the promises unkept.
you make a mess of me youve taken my world and thrown it far out into the left field I am not pleased with myself and the surroundings I am sujected to I need support and room to breathe I cant take the sorrow and separation anxiety I cant bring myself to write a single word down for the people that I hate I feel more things now than I used to, my days are not always the same. I have fallen again,now im all wrapped up in those eyes. when I spend with you I lose parts of myself to your wander I lend myself to you, i pluck the golden feathers, leaving a trail for you to follow. I almost can not function with or without you, since I know how you feel, I could be what you seek. fore I have tasted the taste and walked the walk. we flirt like old friends,who had lifetimes before us.
but my words mean something.
they have weight, and cannot be counted.
i’m too good for you to follow, so don’t. paha.
i’m too altruistic for this world, i shouldn’t have been born,
because i’m too righteous for this filthy crooked earth.
someday, sooner than you think, you will know my name.
you will read my words, i will demand it, and my prayers will be answered.
you’ll be lining up to give me your money, and i will give you great reason to donate to my causes. my life is all about helping your life. i will not fail.
i cannot be stopped.
i am about to set the world on fire.
I realize that i will never have intimacy with others like the ‘normal’ people. things will always be this way for me. I will be alone forever. I will have more fun fantasizing about affection than I will recieving it.
im gorgeous in my own right. I was blessed with a spectacular figure, and it is rarely shared. the main reason for this is no man can use his words, nor can he properly satiate my sexual needs.
all of you, go fuck yourselves, and contact me if you ever think of something worth verbalizing.
I have got the ether in me.
everything I do is incriminating,
I feel nothing that I do is criminal.
I have mostly good intentions.
there are a lot of negative distractions,
too many walking, taking, dead.
I know humans, mutants, aliens, and I have seen the forth kind. ;/
things are not well with many people,
I know nothing of the hatred and agression that is infused with who we are.
reality is closer than you think, don’t look too far.
it’s waiting for you right across the street.
obama is the best possile president we could have right now,
BARACKTHEVOTE,do it. vote! asap.